You are happy! You met someone and they seem to be the perfect fit. Now, you find yourself planning a wedding, but there’s one small problem. His kids do not like his decision.
So what do you do? Do you go ahead, get married, or is this a sign of more trouble to come?
Blending families is not an easy undertaking, yet most don’t reach for help or support in making this transition. Co-parenting children is a difficult task in and of itself, but now doing that, while trying to navigate this newly married life with someone, can be extra stressful, if not overwhelming. Positive stress is still stress. Change is always stressful, even if it’s a wonderful event, such as a marriage. This sudden change is bound to explode, if communication is also challenged.
Suddenly adding members to an established family is never easy. Routines and family norms are suddenly forced to change, things like the increase in food consumed or an increase laundry that needs to be washed and not mention the blending of incomes.
Something as simple as having pre-emptive discussions regarding roles and how to co-parent, could be a saving grace. However, communication is often strained when one adult tries splitting their time between their new spouse and their own children. Some of the most challenging feelings that arise in these moments are:
- Fear
- Resentment
- Anger
- Anxiety
All is not lost if your find yourself in this situation; help is available. If you identify with any of the above, please call for an appointment.